Do you ever feel guilty as a mom and start questioning yourself? Am I doing enough? Spoiling them? Am I spending enough time with them?
Well, you’re not alone! I use to do this all the time, feel shitty about my parenting and just be an overbearing parent or buy their love with gifts. But a couple of months ago I decided to tackle it another way. I first started by taking care of my well being and my emotional state of mind so they can have a better mom. I then asked them what they needed of me, because yes, I know they need to be fed, clean clothes and reminded to take a bath (several times a week!) but what did they WANT from me.
My son stated he liked movie night but also wanted to watch movies/shows that were not appropriate for his 6 year old sister but appropriate for a 12 yr old. He also said he wanted to work out with his dad like they used to, and to go grocery shopping with me and pick out spices for a meal he would like to cook for us on the weekends (he would like to have a restaurant when he’s older).
My daughter on the other hand, gave me a LONG list that I had to ask her to drop it to 3 things that truly were special for her. She said, do our nails, paint a picture and go shopping, just her and I.
We are starting this weekend and I couldn’t be more excited! We agreed to have more open conversations about what we need from each other, and I was thrilled to see my daughter a few days later TALK (not scream or cry) to her brother and ask if he could play with her for 5 minutes.
I will talk more about this in next weeks podcast but I wanted to let you all know, as I was excited on how open dialogue was helping our family.