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When life hits you in the face

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It has been awhile since I’ve written a blog, which is a little comically, let me tell you why. When the shelter in place started, there was fear, anxiousness of the unknown and once there was some sort of “routine” in place, I set goals for myself, one of those? Write a blog post weekly, possibly two since I thought I would have all the time in the world.

Wrong.

Managing distance learning, working remotely from home and managing a household and a marriage was a TON of work. I then told myself “It’s ok Yolanda, when the kids are in summer break you will have more time, don’t beat yourself up”.

Wrong again.

Now I had two kids, who needed to be entertained or at least guided on what to do all day. I mean, yes, they played video games and watched TV more than I would like, but seriously, did I have any choice? We went for TWO 45 min walks a day, played in the backyard and baked cookies…now what to do for the next 12 hours?

We are now approximately 4 months in and now there is new things I’am struggling with, feeling overwhelmed with emotion and anxiety. It’s not even about a virus, it’s about the roller coaster we are experiencing with the news (yes, I started watching/reading again) about re-opening phases and then postponing them. To be honest, it’s about my friend and family, their businesses being impacted. I can’t handle it, knowing their worry, thankfully we were able to open once construction was deemed essential, but the anxiousness I felt before that was overwhelming. I can’t imagine being like that for months.

I’m also feeling overwhelmed with all the talk about schools opening, we all have different opinions and what we consider what is best for our kids. I’m here to say, do you, do what you feel right for YOUR children, but please, don’t shame other moms for doing what is best for THEIR children. You don’t know the struggles and choices they have to make for their children.

Being with my kids and husband for practically 24 hours, 7 days a week, I can tell you we have bonded but our patience is short and our energies are high. We are all learning to talk out our emotions, to listen and to give space. Has it always been easy? No, we are a family in progress.

As long we all remember that, we will be ok.

I have now decided to focus more on podcast episodes and I have been able to record a few new episodes this week, which I’m very excited for all of you to hear. I will be releasing them weekly now! Yay!

Now to you, if no one has asked you yet, how are you doing?

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